45. Creative Ways to Involve Pride in Your Wedding

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Hello. Hello, queerly. Beloved. Welcome back to this week's episode. So happy that you are all here. Joining me. And happy pride once again, I will always be saying that all June because it's exciting and in such a happy time. Of course pride is celebrated year round, but it's really awesome that we get to have this time to come together as community and celebrate. I think. This year and probably, and not, yes, not just probably previous years in the past. It's always tough to find ways to celebrate when there is. Very many other things going on in the world, but I'm hoping that all of us can find. What feels good and right for us So just wanting to acknowledge that it's a happy time, but also there's a lot going on. So, This episode, this week's episode is talking about pride, but we are going to talk about some ways that you can incorporate pride into your wedding day or celebration. Obviously the two of you are already getting married is pretty gay. So there is that. But I think that every couple feels a little bit differently. Like I would say there's not only a spectrum for sexuality, but there's also a spectrum that couples fall on in terms of. If they want to showcase pride at their wedding. Beyond just them getting married. So. I've. Kind of created some ideas and divided the list into subtle and not so subtle. So I will go through all of those. I do think that. I tried to kind of divide them up, but I think that a lot of them could go on either list. It sort of just depends on how all out you go. And this is not an all-inclusive list. So if you have ideas or want to send me things that you and your partner had, have done or are planning to do for your wedding, I would love to see that. And share that with the other clearly beloved listeners. Please feel free to DME your ideas or photos or inspiration at wildly connected photo on Instagram. And while you're there, I would love for you to say hello, give me a follow. And my last request here is that if you have not yet rated the clearly beloved podcast, that would mean the absolute. World to me, if you would also, I feel like it would be pretty homophobic if you didn't just kidding, but also not really. And I think that you can actually do it while you're listening. So, if you would leave clearly beloved a review, that'd be amazing. Also, if you're listening on Spotify there are ways and apple too. There are ways to comment on the episode. So if you have thoughts, feel free to leave them there as well. Okay. So we're going to start out talking through some sort of like subtle ideas of incorporating pride into your day. And also just for reference, this can mean, you know, the actual rainbow. But it could also be like the specific colors, like from the BI flag or the lesbian flag, or like those specific things too. It's kind of whatever you're envisioning. So as far as subtlety starting out with, if you're going to do like a cake or dessert, maybe you want it to be like the classic sort of like white and elegant on the outside, but maybe the inside is rainbow. I've seen people do that. And I think it's like a fun, little like, oh my gosh, you cut it open. And there's a rainbow inside. How fun? So. That's number one, number two. Is the bottom of your shoes could be rainbow. I've seen a lot of couples do this, and I think it's so fun. It's just like, I feel like with all of these more quote, unquote subtle ones, it's just like such a fun, little, like, secret that I don't know. I can just imagine like walking up to people and be like, Hey guys, you want to see the bottom of my shoe? And they're probably like, well, no, but it's your wedding day, so, okay. And then you get to feeling. But my shoes are gay. I don't know. I just, I think that's what I'm envisioning with all of these more low key ones. So I think these are all super fun. Number three is kind of just piggybacking on that. Like any kind of accessory that you wear on your day. Could have like hints of rainbow or hints of like the colors you choose. And this can include anything from like your nails to like maybe some strands of your hair. It could also be like your socks. That again, like would mostly be hidden, but you still get to like sneak a peek every once in a while. Hairpins cufflinks jewelry. And I feel like now, We've kind of gotten past. So just like everything being like. Super like obnoxious. With the rainbow, like that's still, I shouldn't say obnoxious, but like, I think some of you can picture, like, sometimes it's just like too much. And I think there's a lot of creators now who are creating. Like, especially in the jewelry world, things that are a lot more like subtle, like maybe it's like a gold necklace. That happens to have a rainbow on it. You know, like something that's just like more subtle. The next thing, that's kind of an accessory, but kind of not your flowers could be kind of subtly rainbow. Whether that's like the whole rainbow or just like pulling from pieces. And I think it's pretty easy to do this with flowers, to have them be like a bit more like pesto and subtle, rather than like bright and bold. Although, if you want to do something bold in the next list you could set, certainly do like a very bold rainbow in your florals. Whether it's with the actual flowers or maybe it's something wrapped around the bouquet. This could apply to boot nears or any kind of other variation of florals as well. Number five, if you aren't involving like a pets, I know it's pretty common for people to have their dogs involved on their wedding day. Just being there or being like a ring bear, they could wear something like one of the bandanas. That say like my moms are getting married or something. That's pretty like subtle, but I think it's very cute and sweet. Number six. This is one of my personal favorites. If you and your partner can find ways to honor past and previous queer historical figures and icons at your wedding. I think that's like a way to be like, Hey, these were like real people from our community, but it doesn't involve like, Hanging a huge rainbow from the ceiling. You know what I mean? But it's also very much like, Hey, these people are important and we want to honor and respect them. So some things I've seen is couples using like photos and like, including a little bit of information about the person as like the table numbers system. So like table one might be. Marsha P Johnson or what have you. And then people get to learn about someone and that's how they identify their table. I've also seen couples just sort of have like, If they have like an extra table in somewhere and the reception room, just kind of having pictures and information about previous and current. Queer icons. So. I think that's really, really awesome. And just sort of like a nod to the community. Number seven. Having queer music, artists playing during your dance. Like, I mean, at this point, There's so many queer icons in the music industry. And I mean, like shout out to Jojo Siwa for starting it, you know, like if, you know, you know, but in all seriousness, yeah, like playing. Queer artists throughout the dance floor and throughout the evening, I think. As like a really fun way to. To do it. Number eights, you could include things in your wedding vows to each other. And I think that could look super different for every individual and every couple, whether talking about like the community or your own sexuality is something you want to include in the vows is totally up to you. But I think just like, a line or two in your vows can be a really sweet way. If you're wanting to honor and bring in pride, but not necessarily. Be super bold about it. Number nine is this one may not necessarily feel like the most. Obvious, but I think allowing your wedding party to wear whatever they want to. Is there a really cool way to show like, You're like reflecting and allowing people to live out their gender expression and sort of showing that there doesn't have to be any roles. Like not everyone has to wear a dress. Not everyone has to wear a suit. It can kind of be all over. And I feel like that's just like a really cool way to show. That. Pride is inclusive of so many things, including so many like gender presentations and wanting everyone to feel safe and comfortable in your wedding party is a really awesome way to do that. Number 10 is. If you want your invites to have some cute little subtle rainbow elements. And again, like it doesn't always have to be like, Super super bold colors. Like something I actually tried to do with my own website was have the colors be just like a little bit more muted, a little softer. Just because sometimes like the really, really intense red and orange and yellow, like it can be a lot. So having some of those like little subtle elements on your wedding invites, I think would be really, really cute. So, like I said, this is not a comprehensive list. I think there's so many things that you could totally do. And maybe it's even things that you do as a couple that not everyone even knows about or will necessarily see, but that, you know, as a couple. And that's why I think this is kind of a spectrum because I think. Every couple gets excited about different things in terms of like sharing pride on their wedding day. And truly for some couples, they're like the biggest moment of pride right here is like me marrying my person. And I fully agree like. That is, that is proud if I ever saw it. But I hope that from some of those more subtle ideas, maybe. You want to try one out or maybe it inspired you to try something else out. So the next set. It is going to be attacking about some, not so subtle or bold ideas, if you will. On how to incorporate pride on your wedding day. So the first one is, I mean, pride flags. That's, that's pretty that's a low hanging fruit. So if you want to have it as decor a banner somewhere, something like that, or like I've seen couples hand, like little mini ones out to the guests before the ceremony so that the guests can like wave the little flags as y'all exit or. Do different things like that or how them out on the dance floor? I did see that once where there's like pride flags on the dance floor, and that was a really cute. Another. So number two is a variation of that, of using a pride flag in your couples photos. Again, this can be the actual like rainbow flag, or it can be like the flag of that book best represents the two of you. Excuse me. And this wouldn't have to be like an, all of your photos. Like I think sometimes couples are like, well, I don't want to do that. Cause I don't want that. And like all the photos. No, at least for me, like I would take like one or two and be like, okay, great. Let's go back to you guys. Obviously, totally up to the couple, but. Just wanting you to know you can do it really quick. Okay. Number three. I remember seeing, I feel like 10 or 15 years ago doing the whole like rainbow smoke bomb thing was so huge. Like, I feel like everyone was doing it. And I see why like the end result is super cool and awesome. However. Now that's just kind of a no-no one, because like the smoke bombs can sometimes be toxic. They can also stay in your clothes. And also for thinking about the environment and leaving no trace. That would not be our best bet, but I just wanted to bring that up to like, think of like other inspiration. Like, could you have your whole wedding party? Like, could you do them fold a different color streamer or. Something like that, something that would give you like a similar effect, but. It doesn't require a smoke bomb. Because also smoke bombs have started forest fires in the back and in the past. And we definitely don't want that. So. No spoke no smoke bombs, but something similar I think would be a really, really cool. Number four is having a gay photo booth. Heck yeah. And this can be like, the backdrop could be rainbow. The props that people hold could have like different. You know, sayings like we, you hauled or whatever like that, whatever creative things feel relevant for you. I think that would be super fun. And it would also be like a really cool thing for guests to be able to take home and like be able to like show people and, you know, just like a good memory of your day and like, Expressing to people like how awesome and amazing, and also normal going to a gay wedding was. Number five. This was mentioned first in the last list, but having like a very out there. In terms of like bold colors, rainbow cake or dessert. I actually went to a wedding a couple of years ago where the couple had rainbow popcorn. Like they had like every different kind of color, like red, orange, yellow, green. And they were all different flavors of popcorn and that was actually so amazing. The popcorn was fire. I can definitely ask where they got it from if anyone's interested, but. You could put a rainbow spin on any kind of dessert you want to do. And number six is also related. You could do something like a themed. Cocktail like a queer or a rainbow inspired cocktail, whether it's actual colors or maybe it's just like the name, like. You could have. I don't know. Renee wrap inspired cocktail. So there's that. Number seven is incorporating just like funny. Signs or slogans throughout the wedding, but it's not just a core. I seen one that says the gay agenda on it, and then like, has like the schedule for the evening underneath. So. Things like that. Or using that kind of language, like on your invites or you know, maybe you have a sign up in the reception area. Talking about the food or just, or it's like incorporating some of those little fun slogans into your day, I think is really cute. And. Is definitely tells people exactly what it's about, especially the, say the gay agenda. So, but I think it's a great way to like, keep it fun and lighthearted. Number seven, the wedding party code actually dressed. In rainbow themselves. Like if you wanted to go all out, you could have each member of your wedding party in a different color of the rainbow. That would be a great replacement for the smoke bombs for sure. And having everyone stand in order. Oh my gosh. What a vibe? That or you could also ask your guests to dress brightly and, or in rainbow colors. Imagine taking like a huge group photo with everyone. Representing all of the different colors. That would be amazing. Number nine. I have seen it's become more popular for couples to, instead of asking for gifts. Because one, just a side note, I think. A lot of queer couples. If not all of them are probably living together before they get married. And so there's maybe less of the need to like get new spoons. If it's something they already have. all that aside to say, like, not every couple does like a similar kind of registry. And I have seen people do it for other things. Like. Please donate to our, you know, future surrogate fund or whatever. And alternatively, you could also ask us to consider donating to a queer charity of your choice instead of leaving allograft. I know that's like a huge ask, like, especially because weddings are so expensive and all of that. So if that is not feasible for you, then that is totally understandable, but it is an idea. Number 10. The favors that you give to your guests could be rainbow or gain inspired. I think that would be like, again, another super sweet thing to be able to be able to take home and the rep as they go out into the world. And finally, one of my favorites is hiring a drag queen or other queer performer for your reception. I think that's definitely a, not so subtle way to say that. You are celebrating a queer wedding. And every wedding I've been at that has a drag performer has just been so fun. Everyone loves it and is entertained. And it's just like a nice little way to even switch up what your reception is like, you know? And I think that just goes hand in hand with of course, like hiring other queer vendors and Yeah, just showing that you're working with queer vendors is a great way to tell people that you're having a queer wedding also. So. That was 21 different ideas on how to incorporate pride into your wedding or celebration. Again, There's so many things and like so many like niche things that could fall under all of those categories. So I definitely know I didn't hit it all. And. From what I've seen, like people are so creative, so just be creative with this. Have fun. And also don't feel pressured to do anything that feels not authentic to you. This is obviously not a requirement, but I do know that some couples. Want to do it, but they also just don't want it. To be like tackier and authentic. And so hopefully this got the cogs in your brain going and inspires you to figure out what feels right for you and your partner on your wedding day. That is all that I have for you. Again, I would love to see your ideas or photos of things that some of you have done. I can't wait to see what all of you are planning. As I shoot weddings throughout this season as well. I hope that you all continue to celebrate pride all month long, and I will see you all in the next episode.