Queerly Beloved
Queerly Beloved
53. The Urgency of Making Inclusive Changes in Your Business
It's 2025 my dudes, and one thing we are not going to do, is start our year off by continuing to drag our feet on making important changes in our businesses. Being a more inclusive vendor is important and should be treated with urgency as a means of respect. We need to chat about it's important to do better once you know better in a TIMELY manner.
The intro and all instrumentals were written, sung and recorded by @JaynaDavisMusic
Queerly Beloved, I'm so glad you joined!
Please keep the community going by checking me out on instagram @wildlyconnectedphoto and come say hi! I'd love to hear from you! :)
Beloved. Welcome back to. A double episode. Uh, two in one week or really. Really. Taken off I think after doing this for awhile, winter is definitely the time for me. So. Also, I think it aligns well because a lot of us are, are hibernating and wanting things to listen to as we. Hosey up in our houses for the cold winter. So. Thank you for sticking with and, and joining in for all of these new episodes. The reason that this episode is a double whammy of sorts. Or the second episode this week. Is because I think it's so important overall, but I hope that it's a really good way for us to kick off the new year. And I'm going to be talking about. Oh, man. It's so sad that I even have to say this, but again, I'm making inclusive changes in your business. Isn't necessary. But I also want to talk about why making those changes in a timely manner is so important. And this is actually a based off of a real life thing that happened to me. And so. you know, this might feel like I'm throwing shade and that's okay. Because I think for the purposes of this episode, The story will, will do what it needs to do. And obviously there's no hate, but it's okay to have a little shade sometimes. So back in, uh, early October. I photographed a wedding. And it was a couple where both of them identified as breads. Okay. So it was two brides. And when these two brides. We're being announced. Just kind of right after they had come in from their grand entrance, the DJ said Brian and grim. And for extra context, this same DJ who exactly one year ago. The past October had done the exact same thing. With another set of two brides. Okay. So normally I'm a very like non-confrontational person, which I know is a weird thing to say as I'm. Hosting a podcast that can at times be very confrontational. Uh, but listen, it's a lot different talking into a blue microphone, then waltzing up to. A big tall man, DJ in person. Live action. But I decided to do it because I was like, you know what? Like, this is not okay. And this is wild that I witnessed it. Twice now within one year, like that's just wild. So I approached the CJ. And I just said, you know, respectfully. This is what you said. This is the same thing you did last year. And like, can we talk about this? He was a little bit weird. He did fight me on it, but ultimately he was like, you know what? Like, I do actually really want to talk about this and I do want all couples to like, feel comfortable. And we had a good conversation about it. And I actually told him about this podcast. And. He seemed super interested. He also asked if I would ever have capacity is who like audit his website and give him suggestions. And I was like, You know what. As frustrating as this is like, this is, this is why I'm here. Like, I, I really care about change and helping people make those changes. So like great. Now I know you're probably wondering. Ana. That sounds like a, like a good thing. Where's this going? So glad you asked. So that night before I drove home from the wedding, I use the Instagram contact information that he had given me. And sent him the podcast episode. Where I was like, Hey, this this episode, I'm actually talking with another DJ who talks about how to use inclusive language and how do you use inclusive practices? As a DJ in the wedding space. And he was like, great. He saw the message. And here's where the kicker comes in. He didn't respond to me and tell just yesterday. It is January my dudes. This happened back. In October. His message said, thanks so much. Finally, just getting around to this. Which again, I know some of you might be like, I don't understand what the deal is like. He's, he's looking at what you've sent to him. The kicker for me. Is that we had a conversation about this back in October. And it took until January for this man to Dean that he had enough time to dedicate to something that he claimed. To really care about and to want to change. That is so incredibly frustrating to me because your actions are speaking louder than your words right now. And yes, I'm using this story as a, as a real life example to kind of kick off the episode. But I realized that this isn't, this isn't about him. This is about me continuously seeing how, even though we're trying to, as an industry shift, to be more inclusive, there are so many people who are dragging their feet. And I think that there's a variety of reasons for that. Of course, I think. That's some people. Don't want their businesses to be inclusive and that way, and obviously that's not really. We're targeting. We're targeting the people who do want to change. So I'm just here to remind you. That if you are here today, listening. And it is 2025. And there are things that you have been meaning to do on your website and your business practices and your language. Like it is time. It is time for that change. And it is really, really important work to be doing. This is not something you put off for three months. Like. I also want to give the caveat of, like, I think that there are people out there who are still learning. Like they haven't quite maybe gotten the same information as everybody else. And you don't know what you don't know. So I don't want to necessarily be making all these huge blanket statements, but at the same time, like it is 20, 25 and there are a lot of people out there sharing education, sharing resources. Trying to foster change. So at the same time, it's kind of like, there is so much out there. And it's time. Like this is. I have an important thing to do in a timely manner. And I, I think what's wild too, is that. The people or businesses or organizations who are dragging their feet on this, like they don't realize that they're losing business. Oh, of course, this is so much deeper than business, but like you are losing business because by, by having inclusive practices, like. People are going to appreciate that. And I would say that clients are increasingly looking for businesses that are open about that and that care about that, and that align with their own personal values. And so I think what's just so insane about all of this is that. The. You know, the business owners and organizations who are like, yeah, yeah, we'll get to it. Like we know this is important, but. You know, we're just, we're busy or we're waiting for the right time. It's like, Great. You're losing business. You're losing people. You are not creating a safe work environment, a safe environment for clients to reach out to you. Like. You are missing out on so much because you're a quote unquote, too busy to do something that's really, really important. And I just. On on all sides, it's really frustrating. Right? Cause it's like, how can you not see that this is something that's really good for you? And going to benefit you in a capitalist society, but it's also really good for the people around you. And it's also frustrating because it's just like, by seeing that so much, and by. Seeing people continually not make it a priority. It's like, great. Well, you are just deeming our comfortability and our safety, a non priority. And that sucks. And it also says a lot about you as a person. As a business owner as an organization. Like it really shows your true colors. And I think. That over the next four years. We are going to see a lot of people's true colors. One way or another, but. Despite how our world shifts like. Change is going to still happen. I think it's possible for us to see some negative change, but I think that there are so many people in the wedding industry who care about. Making positive changes who care about being more inclusive, that like, regardless of what happens, like we are moving forward, we're moving forward with making a more inclusive budding industry and like, It's happening like it is happening. It is time. It is time. And the crazy part of it too, is that so much of this. Is easy and it's free. Like even in talking to this DJ that I was referencing at the start of the podcast episode. You know, he was walking me through some things on his website and showing me his contact form and showing me that it's still says bride and groom and You know, is the bride doing a father, daughter dance? You know, just like very, very gendered, very specific things. And I was like, okay, well, I think that's. That's pretty easy to change. Like I think. I think you can change it. And he was just giving all of these yamas busy season and oh, I just, I don't know, like. Is it going to be weird if I start sending out a different questionnaire and you know, all of these things that it's just like, I guarantee that if you were to really sit down and like go through your website and be ready to make all of these changes, you could probably get a lot of add-on in like an hour or two, right? It's not, you're not redesigning your whole website. You're not redesigning the wheel. You're updating language. You're shifting some things. Maybe you change a picture to like, It's it's easy and it's free and it benefits you. And yet people are still just like not seeing it as a priority. And so I really just wanted to throw in this episode for the week. Because obviously it's, it's January, it's a new year. I think it's a time when people are interested in. New habits and practices and goals and all of that. And so I think that this is such a good way to kick off the year, because if you've been dragging your feet again, like now is the time. If you're not sure, like. Please reach out to me. Or, you know, hire another queer content creator artist. Trend and buy them lunch. Like. There are ways that you can do this and you kind of just need to take that first step, like. It's so frustrating. As a queer person, as somebody in this space to like see people, not taking the time or effort to do something. That's so simple and can make such a big impact. So, Yeah. It's time. I do it really, really is time and it is valuable. Like I think some people to just. Forget. Or don't see the value in like, okay, well, if my contact form says bride and groom, like. All that person has to do is in, in the notes. In the contact form, just like, let me know that, that one of them isn't a bride or something. Like come on now. Come on. That is just an incredibly wild thing to say that. It doesn't matter that much or. Whatever cause no, like people. That will scare people away, or if it doesn't like what a terrible position to put them in. Okay. I am. As you can see very, very heated and passionate about this topic. So. I'm gonna, I'm gonna leave it there. Thank you for listening to my little rant and honestly, If there are people in your circles. That you're aware of that you've been like having these conversations with, or you noticed it on their profile or in their work that maybe they, they have some shifts to make and you feel comfortable. Either sending them this episode, or just trying to have a quick conversation with them. I think that was also a great time to do that. And honestly, to, from, again, from like a pro business standpoint, like these next few months are like big booking months. As people are getting engaged and I'm starting to like really deep dive into their wedding planning for the upcoming year. So like be ahead of the curve, like show people that you are inclusive, that you care. And that you want to keep growing and being a better vendor, all right. Clearly beloved. Thank you so much for listening. Yeah, please feel free to reach out to me on Instagram. Or VMI website or email just reach out if you were struggling with this, or if you're struggling to figure out how to talk to another vendor about this, like I'm here and I want to help. And. It's, it might be scary to make those changes too, but it's going to be fine. So. That is all I have for you today. Have an awesome day.