60. Talking All Things Queer Wedding Attire w/ Portrait Of a Bride On Fire

Trying to figure out what you want to wear on your wedding/ elopement day can feel overwhelming for some- dress? pants? neither? both? Listen to this week's episode with Kati from @portraitofabrideonfire to chat through tips and ideas for finding ways to dress and present that will truly bring you joy on your day.

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Queer beloved, welcome back. My name is Anna. I used to hear pronouns and I run wildly connected photography as well as this really cool podcast. if this is your first time here, welcome. So excited to have you join. I just had a few quick notes before we get into this week's episode, which has a really cool guest talking about something I wanted to talk about on the podcast for a really long time. But yeah, hope you all are doing well. I was just out in Oregon doing a crazy amount of shoots and it was just so fun and it's so gay out there. I love it. Highly recommend. but also I. Guess what time it is. It's time for no homo, and if you are not familiar, it's now as in KNOW. we are on this journey together to learn more about queer culture, queer, queer lingo, things happening, important information, fun information, et cetera, et cetera. So this week on No Homo. Kristen Stewart got married. Now I know what you're thinking. Like, okay, are we really about to start making this podcast about pop culture? No. I promised I am really not in the loop all that much myself. However, I will say Kristen Stewart has just always felt like this very special gay icon in my mind. Like there's just something about her. I definitely am a Twilight fan in the most ironic way. And so like seeing her like grow from that into like all these roles she's played, um, like Love Lies, is bleeding and all, you know, all these other things. Like she's just so like what an icon. so she married her wife Dylan, I believe, um, on four 20 Iconic. And it was just something small and. They're just such a cool and hot couple and I don't know, like I said, I'm not really in the pop culture circle all that often, so that's why I wanted to share, go look at some of the photos they shared. It's super cute. But that is what I got for you on no homo this week. Before we jump into the episode, I did wanna say there are some really, really smart gaze out there. And so if you have, um, a terminology, a phrase, some important information, something you think should be shared on this segment, please let me know. I would love to pass it along and become more homos together. So please feel free to DM me on Instagram or email me. Or even comments on the podcast because there are cool ways to interact with the podcast, both on Spotify, apple, all the things. So without further ado, let's jump into this week's episode. Okay, clearly beloved, welcome back to this week's episode. I am joined, uh, by Katie from Portrait of a Bride on Fire, and I'm super excited. So, before I say anything else, Katie, will you introduce yourself, your pronouns, and any identities you wanna share? I am Katie. I am a queer wedding fashion stylist. I'm queer for sure, but I say I'm a queer wedding fashion stylist because I think I'm the only one that does this. So my pronouns are she, her, and I am, I'm, I'm here for the queer folks. I'm here for it. Yeah. I love that. So, yeah, for those of us who are not fashion experts, can you share a little bit more about like what that means and what you do? So there's a very small population of like people in an industry that they call themselves bryle stylists, and they will help people find their wedding dresses and style accessories so that your whole head to toe look or how many looks you do on your wedding day are like planned out and really well thought through. And bryle stylists do exist outside of bridal shops like that. However, I. I serve a kind of a different purpose, and that is because queer folks specifically. Nontraditional folks in general, but queer folks specifically because they're nontraditional, uh, don't have a set process for finding their wedding attire when it's not a suit or a dress. And because many queer folks are on the gender spectrum and gender expression, uh, spectrum, uh, the gender expression spectrum, they. Often don't align with gender norms as they are today, or the social norms of formal attire for those genders, which is like a suit and a dress. And because there's no process for finding formal attire for your wedding, it's really challenging to navigate that industry by yourself when you're planning a wedding and doing a million other things. So I I am a little bit different in that I. I problem solve and think creatively and try to find things that are outside the mainstream to connect people with resources and designers and like smaller businesses. And basically it's a lot more of connecting people and solving problems than it is the creative like aspect of styling and aesthetics and all that stuff. Yeah. Yeah. So you're not like the human out there like. Making someone's outfit, but you're like, Hey, like here are these options. And like, here's what I think would work really well together. Yes. Like, I'm not, I'm not a designing or like sewing or any of that stuff. I would just connect people with people who do that. And it's a little bit of both traditional styling and also connecting people. So, kind of being a resource and also being a creative mind at the same time. Yeah. That is, yeah. That is so cool. And much, much needed. Yeah, as a lot of my listeners know, I'm like planning my own wedding right now. And I think you are also, I'm, I'm getting married in like a month. Oh my God. Mine's in September, but congrats. That's so exciting. You know what you're wearing. I do have a dress. Oh, good. But yeah, it is like. I don't know. I, I feel like this is just like one thing where it's like, I, like you have a vision in your mind, but like, I don't like how to know how to make it come to life and like, so yeah. I just, I think what you do is so, so awesome. Wait, what's your vision? What do you mean you don't know how to make it come to life? What's your vision? Is it different? No, just like, well, I, so I do have a dress but the vision is I wanna make it into like a two piece dress. Yeah. And so that's been like, its own kind of struggle, just because, do you So I haven't seen a ton of those. I'm wearing a two piece dress for. Shut up. Oh my God. Yeah. I honestly, okay, so I don't know how old you are, but when I was like in middle school, like, uh. Crop tops and long skirts, separates were a thing for like prom and stuff or whatever. Mm-hmm. And so maybe it was high school, I don't remember. But, uh, point being is there's a population of people who remember that time and don't want separates to be a thing again. But I honestly think that they're very much up and coming. So, I am super into the separates game, especially for, I mean, I'm a skirt and dress girly, so like I love wearing skirts and dresses, but like. Separates are so underrated, like why are we not making more outfits? I don't know. It's just like there's so many more possibilities out there with separates. So, but yeah, if you ever need help, I'll send you my lookbooks for inspo or if you need any, whatever resources, let me know. Yeah. Oh my gosh, that's incredible. Yeah. Yeah, I went to a private school so I didn't, with like a uniform, so I. Wasn't in that same cool prom loop. But I think actually this is, this is something interesting that I think kind of flows into like the next topic of discussion anyways is like, from your perspective, do you think that the people you work with tend to wear things to their wedding that are already very, like, similar to what they do or like day to day or like Totally different. And I guess I'm asking because like for me, I, I haven't worn a dress in probably like three years. Like they're not my thing, but for some reason, like something about me. Picturing getting married, like, I wanna wear a dress. So, I don't know, I think that's kind of an interesting, yeah. Curious. Yeah. I think it, the answer to that question definitely depends on who you are, because I have a couple clients who are like, I want to wear something that really feels like me. So it's more of an elevated version of what they normally wear on a day-to-day basis. Right. It's higher quality, it's embellished, it's something that is different that's gonna really elevate their outfit. And then I have other clients that, uh, like you have not worn dresses in years and really thought that they were gonna wear pants to their wedding because of that, uh, because they, they found it hard to see themselves. In a dress, even though that's like the ideal, right? I was actually at a wedding dress appointment with a client last week and they were set on a jumpsuit. And of course there are no jumpsuits at wedding dress shops, maybe one, and usually they're ugly. But anyways, they wanted a jumpsuit. So the idea was the dresses they were trying on were going to be converted into a jumpsuit, and my client was. Uh, tried on one of the dresses and was almost in tears and was like, I like this as a dress so much that I just wanna wear it as a dress. And for the first time in like three years, they're gonna wear a dress. Mm-hmm. And sometimes the world is so like messed up that like, maybe you don't wear a dress for three years because you don't have the confidence to wear a dress for three years, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't be wearing one on your wedding day, you know? At the same time, just because like you identify a certain way or you present yourself normally a certain way, doesn't mean you have to wear a dress on your wedding day. I think the social norms that dictate formal wear are so archaic and like if we just really need to break that mold to like make it okay to do whatever you want, you know? Yeah. Yeah. I love that the social norms are indeed archaic. Yeah. Yeah. No, I think, I think that makes a lot of sense. And so, I mean, yeah, I, I would love to just like kind of chat about like queer wedding entire, like just dive a little bit deeper. I know you touched on it a little bit in your intro just as far as like. How needed this is because not everybody you know mm-hmm. Fits into those certain boxes or things like that. But yeah. Can you kind of just like give an overview of like. What options are out there? Maybe some cool things you've seen and then we can dive into the specifics. Yeah. Before we get into the, like what's an in-between option or what is not traditional options? I do wanna hold space for the people that are. Wearing suits, but whom suits are not designed for them to wear. Yeah, there's a lot of people who don't fit into suits like normally and aren't made for their types of bodies or whatnot. And similarly, there's a lot of people who would like to wear dresses. Traditional wedding dresses and they're just not made for their bodies. Maybe because they're assigned male at birth, maybe because they're plus size, whatever, right? There's a number of reasons why you might fit in those gender norms and still not find your wedding attire. So we hold space for those people and we wanna live for these people too. But outside of that, there are still a lot of people that want to express themselves in ways that are not part of the traditional like suit or dress attire. And. The problem with social norms dictating traditional attire is like the social norms are, you know, uh, built through the patriarchy and through white supremacy. And so they're like inherently trying to suppress like, like certain things, right? They, that women shouldn't wear pants and they need to cover their legs and, you know, whatever it is. So it kind of still dictates the norms of today. But the question is, if you don't fall into those like. Gender norms for formal attire, what do you wear? Because the social norm that says if you're outside of the norm, it's not formal anymore. What is your solution? Mm-hmm. So I think my, the problem that I've had to begin to solve recently is, is how to, how to, how to think about formal attire in a way that is. Socially acceptable as a queer person that doesn't wanna identify or can't fit into the mold that people have prescribed for us. And I, my creative solution to that is then well, like what are formal events outside of weddings is basically like the red carpet or then that gala or whatever, and they treat. Formality and fashion very differently than we do at weddings, and I like, like, why is that? Because Billy Porter can wear a dress. Slash suit on the red carpet and absolutely slay and that's fine, but it's not as socially acceptable to do that at your wedding for some reason or why. Does Billie Eilish wear a t-shirt and shorts on the red carpet? And that's socially acceptable, but it's not socially acceptable to wear a t-shirt and shorts to your wedding. Granted it's not. An old ready T-shirt and shorts. It's a Louis Vuitton shirt and shorts. But my point is that we should really be reformulating what we think is formal in like acceptable and formal occasions. And. Right now it's kind of being held back. The wedding industry is really held by tradition and the fashion wedding industry is really held by tradition. So even though fashion itself is quite the opposite in terms of innovation and wanting to do the next big thing so I guess my problem is trying to think creatively about how we do these things. And because there are a lot of queer people who don't feel comfortable in anything other than a t-shirt. So how do we make a t-shirt? Like your wedding attire. I have a friend who's a designer in New York and actually is incorporating a t-shirt into his first collection of like wedding attire. So, because he knows that those people exist that want that comfort, you know? Mm-hmm. And I think part of the problem is that people don't have the confidence to wear whatever they want because the world is the world, right? And so part of the job is, is finding. Creative solutions to wedding attire, but part of the job is also trying to uplift and empower people to be like, you can wear whatever you want, it's your day, but also you should wear whatever you want on every other day anyways. And like kind of empowering people to be more themselves and just to be more them centric, which is. I don't know, sounds like a hot take, but it's not, uh, to take up more space, especially on your wedding day. It's your day. So it's a little bit of a, it's a little bit of like helping people find these resources and helping people think about the fashion industry, but also just like really empowering people to be themselves and to reclaim that day for themselves. Yeah. Oh my gosh. You, I think you just like blew my mind with like talking about like the comparison of how the standards are totally different for something like a red carpet versus a wedding. Yeah. Like I've literally never thought about it, but like that is so true and it's like, yeah, you see a lot more. People wearing things they wouldn't normally or dresses or suits, whatever, like, yeah. That is so interesting. I also think what you said about like empowering people to feel more themselves and what feels, you know, comfortable and like them is so accurate. And also it brings to mind, I just did a recent episode on how like. Trends like as a whole can also feel like very straight and heteronormative. Mm-hmm. And how sometimes it can be tough as a queer person to like go against it, right? Because then you have to like put more energy and you have to like explain yourself. You have to like do all these things. So I guess I'm curious if you have any like, tips for folks on kind of navigating that when it comes to what they're wearing. I think that is a much bigger question than I'm able to solve because that is like, uh, to give you an example, I, I uninvited my parents to my wedding and I changed what I wanted to wear after I uninvited them. Not because I really cared what they thought, but like subconsciously in the back of my head I was like, I just don't want to like. Push the label and make problems and create situations and like put more effort in. I don't want to make it more than I needed to be. And so because my parents are just like not people who are fully supportive in my life, and so I didn't want them at my wedding, but that's not the moral of the story. The moral of the story is when you. Take those like pieces out of your wedding that are not fully supportive or not fully you, it actually changes like the way you look at attire and the way that you look at it in terms of a form of self-expression. Because if people are limiting who you are, you're not gonna wanna express yourself. And so I think that that's like a bigger question where it's like. Yeah, you don't wanna have to explain yourself or step on toes, but I like firmly believe that you just shouldn't be inviting those people in the first place. Hmm. If they're gonna ruffle feathers by not inviting people to your wedding, you might as well do it before your wedding. Then on the day of when they start, like quibbling about what you're wearing. Or if you start, go turning inward because, uh, you're like embarrassed or you're not fully feeling yourself, like. It's your day. It is also the like most formal event, biggest event of your life. Because most people don't go to the MET Gala or the red carpet or a celebrity whatever, right? Mm-hmm. That this is, this is your day. It's not, I don't believe that it's the best day of your life. I'm not that kind of person. But it could be, and it, you should treat it as a very big occasion. It is a big deal. I just think that everyone deserves to like feel themselves and be themselves. And so yeah, it's like hard to find wedding attire, but I also just feel like don't take on the responsibility of providing for those people that take away from who you are. On your wedding day, which is, I said, it's a much bigger problem than I'm here to solve, but I just, I really, really believe that like you can't fully be yourself if there are people holding you back. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. That's so true. Almost kind of like it's up to each individual person and then together as a couple to kind of decide like what. Their capacity is. Mm-hmm. Like, I don't know, something I feel like I'm thinking is, you're like doing a wedding tour and the person's like, oh, it's two brides, or something like that. Like, of course we're inclusive. Can't wait to see your dresses. You know, like just things like that where people are almost like, mm-hmm. Okay. Is it more important to me to like, you know, save my energy for something else? Or does it feel more important to just kind of be like. Just easier to do this. Like, yeah. So when I, when I got engaged, everyone was like, so, uh, are you wearing a dress or pants? And I'm like, does me getting engaged to a woman that I've been dating for seven years change my gender identity or expression at all? Like, no, it should not, it should not. Like. But then I'm sitting there and I'm like, wow, well, I really should just fucking be myself. You know? I like why it shouldn't change my gender identity, but, but also if I'm not expressing myself who I am at that time, when why not? You know what I mean? Uh, weddings are gonna ruffle feathers no matter what, even if you do everything right. Uh, quote unquote. Right. Uh, weddings are gonna ruffle feathers even when you're as inclusive as you can. Even if you're trying to be as accommodating to everyone as you can. Even if you're trying to invite the people you don't wanna invite. You're gonna ruffle feathers no matter what. Because for some reason people have expectations and when expectations are, are not met, people react really differently. And it's really challenging to see the ups and downs of weddings because weddings are funerals, like weddings are. As much grieving as it is. Celebrating. Like weddings are really fucking challenging sometimes because you take a lot of emotional baggage with you. And I just, I, your wedding's gonna be about you. If you're gonna have a wedding, you might as well make it you, you know? You shouldn't hold a wedding for someone else, you know? Yeah. I love kind of what you called out earlier too, that whatever combination of things that people wanna wear at their wedding are like. Great and totally acceptable. And so I was thinking it could be interesting just to see if you like, had any ideas or things you wanted to share kind of for several different combos. So like, I don't know, I'm even thinking, I've heard people say things like, oh, if there are two people wearing dresses, like you should be mindful of. The, like, shades of light so that they're not like making one, I don't know, just like anything kind of like that, that comes to mind. I personal preference, if you're both wearing dresses, just don't make it the same neckline. It can be the same silhouette, but I just sometimes think if you have the same neckline, it looks really, really like twins. I was thinking about this recently because I have a client couple, so two people who are getting married and I'm styling them both. And I was wondering, even though they have different inspiration for what they wanna wear. I was wondering if they should be going to the same designer, because they're both looking for a custom outfit. Right. And the, the pros and cons of that would be like, if you're going to the same designer, obviously you're going to look very unified. You're gonna look like a com. Like, like it was all well thought out. It's gonna be a lot harder to coordinate something if it's two different designers. However you kind of. Take away someone's of Indi Individuality. When you pick a designer that aligns with one person and out the other. So if they both align, that's great, but you don't wanna take away that individuality. So my point in saying this is I, if you are both like really into a high neckline, then wear the freaking high neckline, you know? But I just really think that sometimes people don't. Dig deep enough to ask themselves like, what really feels like me? They kind of default to things that they're used to and or they expect, uh, that people want them to wear, you know, something like that. And I just think people kind of get stuck especially, uh, in like. Relationships where people identify the same people kind of share personalities at a certain point. And so it's not uncommon to pick a similar dress if you're both wearing dresses. So I don't have any tips for like matching colors. Obviously, like if you wear champagne dress in a pure snow white dress, that contrast might look a little interesting and not have the same bridal effect as it normally would. Also, if you're gonna be happy wearing that, just fucking wear it. You know what I mean? I just, I really believe that like, if you're in touch with, with, uh, personal style and you're in touch with what you love and expressing yourself through fashion, you literally can't go wrong. You really can't go wrong. Mm. Yeah. Yeah. Love that. Yeah. What about like things that I. You like, loved or really enjoyed seeing if like two people are wearing suits or there's one of these? I, what I really actually love to see is just when people think really creatively about it is like, I think. Like the future of bridal fashion, in my opinion, is gonna be like jackets, boleros capes, like those types of things because it's a gender neutral like garment like an overskirt can be over pants. It doesn't have to be over another dress, you know? I think there's a, and a lot of people want the drama of a dress, but not the femininity of a dress. And so I think like. The, the, the creative ways to think about it's how do you incorporate the drama of the, of a train, of a dress without having a dress? Like how do you get a train without having a dress? Is it a cape? Is it an overskirt? Is it, uh, you know, uh, really long sleeves? You know how, uh, like long, 70 sleeves and I just. I think like thinking creatively is the best way to do it because I think a lot of people play it safe and do what they think they should be doing, or they worry too much about shades of white or they worry too much about complimenting each other. When I really think people should turn inward and just think about what makes themselves happy, and then tell a story with that and what your partner's wearing. I see a lot of celebrities that really don't dress the as like. They don't go off, they don't like dress as well as they should at their wedding. And I, I don't know what it is, but they are like way more closed off. And I just feel like there's a lot of people who don't express themselves enough at their wedding. And so I would just really encourage everyone to like, I. Explore, do a lot of inspiration, like looking at a lot of inspiration and thinking about what is out there because there's a lot of possibilities and it's not just like suit and dress. So, you can play with color, you can play with texture, you can play with the fabrics, you can play with silhouettes and pants and skirts and anything. Jackets and corsets and anything, you can literally play with it all. So I think that's, it's really fun when people get creative. I wouldn't worry too much about it if it feels like you. It's good. Yeah. Are there some things that like you have like seen recently or see like popping up that are like, just super fun and interesting in terms of. Styling. I think something that's really interesting is, well, there's, there's more brands doing, having inclusive styling. When I say inclusive styling, I mean they're incorporating a little bit more of pants. Uh, they aren't necessarily being inclusive in their representation of people wearing those clothes, but it's fine. Uh, but I wanted to note that, I think the more fun things. And the new shift that we're seeing is like for the wedding party. And 'cause I think that's also really hard and that's something that I do sometimes as well. And so I wanna talk about it because people are in a wedding party way more than they're getting married. And it's hard in a wedding party when everyone wants to be identical because if you're not a dress girl and everyone's wearing a dress and everyone's wearing an identical dress on top of it, you're really gonna stick out and you're trying not to stick out in a wedding party usually. And. So that gets really challenging. So I would really encourage anyone who's going to get married to not put too many rules around what people are wearing. Uh, leave it a little bit open-ended if you wanna dictate colors, dictate colors but really let people experiment with what they find. What they find formal and like great. And like try to coordinate it after the fact. Let your wedding party wear capes and vests and pants and whatever. Because I think a wedding party is an archaic like understanding of like weddings anyways, that there are only girls on the girls side and boys on the boys side. It's kind of weird and not really modern. And not really the case anymore. So I don't know why bridal parties are still a thing, but I think that if you're someone who's having a wedding, if you're not putting the pressure on queer people to do something different when everyone else is doing what the traditional norm is, really ostracizes queer people further. So I just like would really encourage anyone who's like getting married soon to think about in their wedding party. To encourage more than just the queer people to think outside the box. Because I think that would really, really change the game. Some things that people do that I think do think outside the box that could be like gender fluid things are I. Scarves or like an ascot, you know, like something around your neck that's not necessarily a formal like men traditional men's tie. Or like a bolo tie. Those are very, I would see those are gender neutral. Stuff around your neck. Capes are definitely gender neutral. I think the style of the cape is like sometimes feminine and sometimes max masculine, but I think. Tapes can be that gender neutral and also monochrome outfits are always formal no matter what. So I think that's like a gender neutral way to do like a wedding party. As long as your like outfits matching. If it's separate, it's fine, you know? Wow. I love even just being able to ask that question. How did you say it? Like how do you view formal, like that's so. I don't know. I, I, it's like something I would never think about, but like even just being asked that and being like, oh yeah, what do I think? Like, that's such a good way to kind of kick things off. So, yeah. I love that. So kind of like, as we start wrapping up, for folks listening who are like, yes, Katie, you got me. I love this. Like, I'm, I really wanna try something different. I like wanna, you know, maybe get outside of my comfort zone. But like, there's so many options, like mm-hmm. How do you usually tell people to kind of start. Like narrowing in, like, am I leaning more towards pants? Am I leaning more towards a dress, but a different neckline? Like how does, how do you, how does one even do that? I think there's a lot less options than you think. Mostly for gender fluid attire. Like I said, there's no, there's no prescribed process for finding gender fluid wetting attire like there is for a traditional fem like dress or a traditional mask. Tuck suit, what have you. And so things start to pile on top of each other. The limitations start to add up because there's like a budget limitation, which really eliminates a lot of options. Uh, there's a size limitation because when you're dealing with smaller budgets, your odds are you're not dealing with a custom measurement situation, which means like you're stuck to the standard measurements of the brand, which are. Most of the time, not inclusive. And then there's the whole, well, what color do you wanna wear? You know, that's when you, I mean, then there's also like, are you, are you disabled where you have to have a certain type of attire? You know? And like you get to a point where once you finally get to choose what you're wearing, you are at a very much smaller like pool of options. So I find it is actually really, really easy to narrow down what you're gonna wear because once you start having, once you start getting into the field of this is the universe of what I can choose from and have personal preferences from based upon all the things I can't control I think things start to make a little bit more sense, such as like, I want a cape, but all the capes are $4,000 and my budget is $2,000. Like, then you might be stuck with. Maybe we have to find one on Etsy or maybe we have to like find one resale and then you might have to like give on color because it's not necessarily, it's something that's in your budget, you know? And it's really just problem solving until you can find something that fits the bill. And I think that it's really tragic that there are not more options out there, because I think typical people, traditional people. Even the privileged people have have options. They have all the options in the world. And so I just, I don't think there's, there's that much out there that is going to fit all of the intersections of those limitations. Oftentimes it's like. How do you maximize the amount of options that you have with all the limitations that you have And like, that's what I do, right? Like that's what I do, is I'm here to like give you all the resources to show you that there are more options so that you don't have to default to address when you don't feel comfortable wearing one. Or you don't have to default to a suit when you want something a little bit more feminine. That's what I do. I mean, I literally just. Research and research and research and try to find more and more and more in multiple different kinds of budgets so that people can have more options. Like, that's pretty much all I do. To answer your question, like if you had all the money in the world and you were optimally the size that people normally have and you didn't have any like disability that limited what kind of clothes that you could wear, what have you, right? And you had all the options in the world. I think the best place to start for finding what you wanna wear is think about what you really find joy in, and not necessarily what kind of fashion do you find joy in, because I don't think a lot of people know the answer to that question. But like I, for example, find joy in like bright colors. But that doesn't necessarily mean I'm gonna be like wearing bright colors at the wedding because I don't know, I wanna wear white. But my point is to start with the things that you really find inspirational, that you find joy in. I have a client who fi who, whose inspiration board is the intersection between Megan Rapino and David Bowie, and it's awesome. And like that Venn diagram like creating like. The structure and the geometry and the, the, the silhouette of David Bowie. But adding onto like the, the style of Megan Rapinoe is actually so easy. It is so clear in my brain what that looks like. And that is like one of the easiest inspo words I've ever had to put together because somebody said, I'm inspired by these two things, which is. David Bowie and the structure of their attire and Meghan Rapinoe style. Granted, those are things directly related to fashion, but I also had someone give me a mood board that had like graphic design and paintings on it. That has nothing to do with fashion, but when you're conveying an emotion, there's a way to translate that into attire, and I think that's. If you have all the options in the world, I think you should probably get a stylist because it would be really challenging to translate what you love into fashion if you're not used to it. Yeah. So kind of starting out with a Marie Kondo approach, like does it bring joy? Oh, 100%. Yeah. I mean that, I think that is how you should approach everyday fashion anyways is like what really brings you joy? What doesn't push your, what pushes the boundaries without pushing your limits, you know? You don't wanna overstep your own boundaries, but you also wanna push yourself to like be challenged in your every day and like create new things. Really return to like the art, the things that moves, move you, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. Well, so on that note I will be sure to share all of your information in the show notes, but how can people work with you? Where can people find you? I am on TikTok and Instagram at Portrait of a Bride on Fire and. The link in my bio will have my other relevant links, which will lead you to my website, my contact form, all the different things. But I just, I, uh, and I wanna say that having a, working with a stylist one-on-one is not the only thing that I offer because that's like obviously a really challenging thing to afford for most people. I really do work with other people's budgets and I can tailor a service to be like. Into your budget and make it work, make sense for you? Because I genuinely think that like you should not exclude people just 'cause they can't afford your services. No. It's like, how do I think creatively about creating a service so that it works for both of us? Like I would, I'm really open to working with people, so if people, my prices are on my website, but again, that's just like. With one-on-one work that's not with tailored packages for making it work for other people. So, I just wanna remind people of that and. Also just tag me in anything you want me to see, because I would love to see your queer outfits and like your Met gala moments, and that would really bring me joy, so, oh, I love that. Oh my gosh, yes. Absolutely. Well thank you so, so much. It has been so fun chatting with you.